The Green Eyed Monster

Hello everybody.  Bet you thought this week would go by and you wouldn't hear from me.  TOO BAD!  ;)  I just had a case of writer's block, but now I think I've got a good one:  Jealousy.

I do a lot of writing aimed toward teens and young adults concerning the topics of relationships with the opposite sex.  I do a lot of posts on friendship as well.  Today I'm going to combine these two topics and address something that's very important to both kinds of relationships.

When my boyfriend and I were still together, we didn't see each other more than two or three times a month.  Our relationship was a secret, really, and we had to be careful.  Anyways, I had other male friends that I saw three or four times a week.  My boyfriend wasn't an idiot, OK.  When I told him I was at such and such an event, he could put two and two together and figure out that I was with this other guy friend of mine--one that he knew I'd liked in the past.

Now I wasn't the smartest when it came to that relationship in general.  I made a lot of mistakes.  But me being my somewhat naive self, I didn't realize that he might be jealous until he actually met my friend.  My friend Rachel could tell you how awkward that meeting was.  The two of us were trying to keep a conversation going, but the two boys just kind of looked at each other.

It didn't take too much longer for me to figure out that my poor boyfriend was jealous.  I finally got him to admit it, and after that I stopped talking about when I hung out with that guy and every other guy.

The problem is that often the person in the relationship doesn't realize they're making the other one jealous.  Usually it's other people who notice the effects of the jealousy.  The thing about jealousy is that it divides.  People that were once friends can be driven apart by the effects of jealousy.  I have a friend whose sister and another one of my close friends are an item.  I spend a small amount of time with my friend compared to his "girl".  (They aren't official or anything yet)  But still I can tell that this girl is jealous of the time I spend with him, and that jealousy is washing over onto her sister to the point where I was actually feeling a little hurt at the way she was treating me.

Jealousy is often called "The Green Eyed Monster".  And it really is a monster.  If left unchecked, jealousy can kill and destroy a friendship, swallow a person whole.  All I ask is that if you're in a relationship, and you feel jealous, please talk to your significant other.  Don't just let the envy fester and consume you.  Those are my words of wisdom for today.  :P

Have a great week.